i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
