The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
