What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
ttyl tear gas
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize