I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
