just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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