I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize