Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
