There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
