I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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