At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Randomize
