but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
