Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
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the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
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He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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