worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
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