Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU