i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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