I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
