Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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