Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Randomize
