This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
