he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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