shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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