my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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