you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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