I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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