i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Hippo gnu deer
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Randomize
