what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
