Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Randomize
