Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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