Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
