More tranny stories later!
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
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Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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