But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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