no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
