I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
