google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
