She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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