i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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