i can't believe i had my finger in that
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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