I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
