You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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