i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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