Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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