that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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