We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
