Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
