i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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