I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
It was like getting head from an anaconda
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
