my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Randomize
