Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Best friends brother. Beat that.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
