so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
