hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
